Random Update.

FAMILY UPDATE:

Malakai has been going through some emotional struggles. It's hard for me to really know how to help him when whatever comes out of my mouth upsets him. Even when I'm trying to be nice. :/ haha Oh well. I'm trying to be there for him and all those feelings he's trying to work out right now. He's so loving and empathetic. (Besides when it involves toys and other kids ha!)
He's trying to figure out how to show his feelings but it always comes out in anger and screaming. I've read multiple websites that have tips on how to deal with an emotional child and only one has seemed to help. I'm very grateful because I'm still trying to figure out how to show my feelings, especially in my marriage. It's HARD WORK.

Khalil just turned 1 last month! I can't even believe it. Seriously, I know I am always saying that. But the having a child the second time around is just.. different. It goes by SO much faster because you're constantly busy, feeding someone, changing someones clothes. I am just in shock about how fast that one year went by! I am so grateful because she's so big and smart and loving. She says at least 8 words and actually understands them. Da-da, Ma-ma, Pa-pa, Kai, Hi, She also seriously says Hallelujah (mostly tries to hahaha it's so dang cute though.)

Divaunte and I have been going through a few little (feels big) trials. I'm so grateful for them though because we're getting even stronger than we were before. Marriage is hard work and if you're not careful it can slip out from under you. It's so crazy but I love it. He's my best friend. I get to literally go everywhere with him! I'm never alone, never un-hugged,  never "goodnight"-less. He is really something. I got blessed big time. Also, he is taking 3 classes and working full-time. I can't even imagine! How awesome is he?!

Last but not least, me. I have been taking Chemistry 1110 and Sociology. I LOVE SOCIOLOGY. Those kinds of classes are my favorite. My Chemistry class has been Hell though. My teacher is so rude when I have questions that I've literally been torn between continuing and withdrawing. My heart is pointed at withdrawing even though it makes me feel a little crappy. The way my teacher "teaches" is not teaching. It's telling us the concepts and then jumping straight to more complicated problems of that concept without any basic knowledge. I really wish I was book smart, but I'm not and it doesn't come easy at all. Anyways. My depression and anxiety has come back a little ever since this class started and I don't like it. So peace out Chemistry. I'm going to go focus on Virginia Beach living. :)

Terrible Two's.

Ohhh where do I start? I have had such a rough week with Malakai. He is trying to figure out what he likes, what he doesn't like. He doesn't understand how to express himself without being one of those, "Why did you bring him out in public?", children. Okay, maybe I'm being a bit dramatic.. But well? We've had a bad week and I know that tomorrow is a new day, but to tell you the truth, I'm TERRIFIED to face tomorrow. I will do it and I will fight through another rough day if that's what it turns out to be but I'm scared. I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing and that I'm trying to take the, 'Trial and Error' affect. He knows how to push my buttons, but I don't know how to keep him from doing that.

No one ever told me that raising a CHILD would be this difficult. Everyone told me that raising a BABY would be difficult. I don't think I ever realized how much he would change and how fast he would grow up. I think that I'm a little bummed about the fact he'll be 3 this October! I have mixed feelings about him growing up. I really miss when he would just lay there quietly where I could kiss him and when he got hungry he'd cry so I'd feed him. I also miss when all he could do is sit up or lay down and I'd feed him 3 jars of bananas in one sitting. I want Malakai to grow up happy. Right now I don't feel like he's happy, so I'M not totally happy with myself as a mother. I'm sure all mom's go through this and I hope I'm not alone. But raising a child is HARD WORK. I love my little man to pieces and he always gives me those days I think to myself, "Awe, that's why I'm here. That's why I'm doing this difficult thing called parenting."

 I wish I could go inside of his mind for 10 minutes, but then again I feel like I'd be on a rollercoaster because I'm telling you, that kid does NOT stop for 10 seconds. He will move on from watching his favorite T.V. episode to riding his bike to getting the milk out of the fridge to unlocking the door and running outside to getting out his puzzles or books, all within 5 minutes, easily. I feel like sometimes I wasn't cut out for this. I don't have the energy he has so how do I keep up with him? I have felt a little lost lately and I know that an epiphany will hit me soon and I'll figure out why I'm feeling this way. Maybe I will find out why he's acting out so badly and how I can handle it but for now, I am lost and on a journey to find what method of parenting is best for him. Maybe I just need to listen to what my heart is telling me and pray for some help.




5-25-2014 UPDATE - I had that blog sitting in my draft for probably almost a year. I honestly don't even remember that phase I went through with him! haha It's so funny to me that we as parents, have to fight through some days and even though we know it's difficult, we just keep putting ourselves through it. (If babies weren't so dang cute!!) No, I am so happy to have found this draft. Because it made me laugh and smile. We are dramatic in the moments our little terrors are on the loose trying to test our patience. I know a lot of my thoughts are irrational while going through hard times but I also know I pull out of it. We have to pull out of wherever we might go to cope with our crazy kids. We are supposed to help them learn different things socially, mentally, physically, spiritually and environmentally. It's so much work. I applaud all of you mothers out there. It is a hard responsibility but it has the most reward.

10-4-2010

 I've decided to blog about my little man, Malakai. He is going to be 2 tomorrow! I can't believe he has grown so big.

 I remember the night I went into labor, all too well. Divaunte, Derrick and I were at Wal-Mart buying Aspen (My little sister) a candy bag for halloween. I was determined to buy that bag. While walking around, I felt TERRIBLE cramps. Being my first pregnancy and all, I had no idea what to expect with labor.

 A few hours earlier, I was asking my mom, "What do contractions feel like?" and she responded, "You'll know it when you feel it."

Well, I didn't know it. I didn't know that I was about to have a baby in the middle of Wal-Mart. Every 30 steps I'd take, the pain was so bad I'd have to stop, hold onto something and breathe. By then, I think we decided they were contractions. Haha!

 I grabbed the Halloween bag and we headed to the register. Standing in line with MAJOR pains, I called my mom. I told her that the contractions were about 1-2 minutes apart. Her exact words were, "Yeah, RIGHT! He'd be falling out!!"  (I wonder what the people in line around us were thinking.)

Divaunte, being the kind gentleman he is, had me go sit in the car while he waited in line to buy this bag. (That was so much more important than getting me to the hospital hahaha.)

Anyways, I remember sitting in the car trying to breathe, not cry and not scream. Poor Derrick was in the back seat probably scared for his life. Divaunte had finally come out and we arrived home. I went straight to the bathroom knowing I'd be peeing my pants if I didn't. I started to cry telling my mom there was blood. (TMI, I apologize.)

My mom had just gotten done dying her hair and it was still completely wet. I was sitting on the couch and my dad grabbed his keys. My mom asked, "Is it okay if I hurry and blow dry my hair?!" I said yes. My dad said NO. Haha we were off to the hospital.

I sat in the passenger seat while Divaunte sat behind me in the back seat holding my shoulder. We arrived at the hospital and while walking in, a pregnancy class was walking out. (I thought that was pretty funny.) Then, it dawned on me.. We still had 5 weeks left to take a class and we hadn't taken any yet! We had no idea what was going to happen. All we could do was hope that they'd stop the labor. Which was not going to happen. I was dilated to a 5! The nurse was concerned when she told us, "You guys are having this baby tonight." Me and Divaunte looked at each other puzzled and scared. Divaunte had helped calm me down for my epidural because I was so nervous! He held my hand the whole time and comforted me through it all. About 30 minutes after arriving at the hospital, I had my epidural and I was one happy girl.

About 15 minutes after I got the shot, the nurse was checking me. All of a sudden she threw the oxygen mask "SHE'S DILATED TO A 10, LET'S START PUSHING!" I was SO scared! Literally, 2 minutes of 3 pushes and Malakai was out. He was so little! He had major black features when he first came out from being so swollen. :)

Malakai Marcel Oliver.

American Fork Hospital.October 4, 2010.10:55 PM.

4 LBS. 10 OZ. 15.5 INCHES LONG  

Malakai was perfect. They had him on the Oxygen machine for 1 hour to make sure he was okay, then took him off and his breathing was great. The one thing we needed him to do was learn to eat on his own. For 2 weeks he was on IV's and had been using a feeding tube to be fed. We were there constantly in the N.I.C.U. with him. Watching him in his incubator, with all of these cords attached to him. Finally, on the 23rd of October, he was able to come home.

                                                  In the hospital.

Malakai under the lights.

                                 

                                 

                                              Malakai all Grown up.

 

     We are so blessed to have such a healthy, handsome,fun little    boy for our son. He is so happy all of the time and I really am so lucky to have the two happiest boys by my side. 

         Happy birthday Malakai!:)

For Starters...

Instead of summarizing what I want to do with this post, lets jump right into it!
My family is what is most important in my life. They are what keeps me going through the heartache and the pain. We are working on getting our own place within a couple months, preferably a town home. SO EXCITING.  We will be sealed this October, 2012 for eternity in the Salt Lake City LDS Temple. We are working on a lot as a family right now. Divaunte and I have both been working hard and going to college at Utah Valley University. I am a proud mother of one 19 month old. Malakai. HE KEEPS ME BUSY. A good busy... I think. Well that's a lot about what is going on in my life right now.. I just am ready to get into the interesting stuff! So lets do this.

Things I enjoy:
I love going swimming with Divaunte and Kai.
LDS temples. They are gorgeous.
In love with PINTEREST. Yes. I know, I'm such a lady.
I enjoy education. Learning makes me happy. :')
BABIES. I can't lie, I'm very baby hungry.
Saying our nightly prayers.
Good people!
Sun-shiny days.